Boneless

Ugly Dwarven Barbarian (Deceased)

Description:

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Bio:

Boneless: (adj) having had the bones removed; lacking physical or mental strength.

Boneless was orphaned as a young dwarf through mysterious circumstances. After wandering around the outskirts of Nodington, he eventually found his way to the sewer system, where he found an ample supply of less than fresh food and protein rich bugs. He spent years (however many it took for him to reach adulthood) in the sewers, becoming more savage every day. His daily activities included scavenging for food and fighting the inevitable alligator and other dangerous ex-pets that made their way to his homeland.

Around the time Boneless reached adulthood, he was found a member of the Nodington underground in the process of dumping a carefully rolled rug. Impressed by the way Boneless ripped the alligator he was fighting in half, and selectively ignorant of the way Boneless devoured the alligator’s insides, he invited Boneless to join him on the surface for more respectable profession.

Boneless spent the next couple of years bouncing around in various mob positions before eventually being fired for failing to understand that “putting pressure” on someone does not always mean introducing face to axe. He was then chosen by the proprietor of the Cake Pounders brothel as their late-night bouncer. His new employer quickly found that Boneless responded well to clear instructions from those he finds impressive, and there was no one more impressive to Boneless than he who commands a legion of (mostly) attractive prostitutes.

Boneless adjusted well to his new roll, though, despite daily attempts, he never managed to seduce any of the Cake Pounders employees (even when offering to pay for their services). Now, several years later, he has begun to grow bored, and wishes he could put his axe to the test on more than the occasional cheap-skate and pervert.

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Boneless

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